Is it normal that I have to take off my pants to get mouth stitches removed?
there's just something about her that screams "i'm into chicks who wear flannel"
you lied. pity sex is amazing.
you decided to have a spaghetti fight but then you got greedy and decided to eat it all.
Judging by the fact that my hair was glued to my head with vomit, yeah I think I couldve used a friend last night
Well, she's officially disappointed in me. I have it writing.
I have a completly random but serious question. Can I make a paper mache mold of you ass and turn it into a pinata filled with airplane bottles of liquor? Its for my art class
work has become about six times more interesting since i started fucking my boss.
Come over. We have tacos... And girls who took their clothes off. But mainly, tacos.
We got Pizza Hut & Papa Johns, delivered within seconds of each other, and both delivery people did a shot. I was put on Earth for this moment.
i know i shouldn't tell you this since i want you to really like me but i just spent the last 4 hours sleeping on the toilet.
Really need a jack off emoji
Who do we write to about that?
Listening to sad Lana Del Rey songs together is an integral part of the lesbian bonding process
He tried to eat me out...through my pants.
What use have I for dignity? It just get's in the way of the really fun stuff.
Randomize
