their songs make me feel all the things I wanna feel. Ya dig?
and what kinds of feelings would these be?
Happy, horny, occasionally hungry
You're the unicorn of the gay community. Unbelievable and unattainable.
remind me to tell you about the ham sandwich empire im building
If my bosses could see, smell or hear me right now they would understand why its a horrible idea to keep the office open sundays
I just peed on my pajamas. Its gonna be a long night. Don't forget the cookies.
He's currently rapping every word to 'more money more problems' at what could be a over 30s gay bar. I'm not sure yet. More info to come.
His morals are debatable, but his heart or perhaps his penis is in the right place.
His penis is crooked. Right place? Maybe he starts there, but then he slants.
I rigged together two of my vibrators for more power... I've created a monster.
My makeup looks extraordinary for nine tequila shots, running four blocks, falling asleep with my face in the toilet, and doing the walk of shame across campus in the rain. And to think I'm single.
she sent me a picture of dilf asleep in bed with the caption "what happened last night?"
Is posting a pic on insta of my previously dyed blue pubes socially acceptable?
Yeah and you keep saying "I know how to win America." While running away from us
You haven't lived until you've thrown up naked in a hotel room in Fargo while holding your breasts so they don't touch the toilet bowl.
These are the last few fleeting sober moments of the day for me. If there is anything you need me to do today, please tell me now
I was masterbating to some porn on my phone and my mom decides to text me "are you okay?" I mean i was doing great until you cock blocked me mom..
Randomize
