I don't get it.
Me neither.
But I masturbated to it anyway.
My dad just passed me a joint.. this is a turning point in my life.
just remembered that i started a tab for just myself at 50 cent beer night last night... i dont understand my life
he came on my stomach, took his sock off, wiped it up, put his sock back on along with his shoes and left.
it's like doing a sit-up... but, you're inside someone
Fuck. These are the symptoms I had when I was pregnant. This could be bad.
someone just sent me a bong wrapped in christmas paper in the mail. signed 'santa'.
juast therw a cheeeeesestirng over the fnce. stuckit to sombodys car winheild... gonna luagh if i find it mlted in the mrning.
I have my vibrator between my thighs and I'm listening to high school musical. That kind of high. We're all in this together.
The moment I said this burrito on my nuts feels really good is the moment I knew I was drunk
If I were better looking, this would be the point where I'd resign myself to stripping.
woke up and you werent here...its ok if we're never going to speak again but my furry hand cuffs are missing and i would like them back. thanks.
someone commented on last weekends photos impressed that so many homeless people wanted to take pictures with us. weird that those "homeless people" are our friends... right?
I don't know what else to tell you.. just listen to some taylor swift and you'll know what to do in the morning
I didn’t spend $100 for a wax to sit here and listen to you FT your brother to complain about how bad the Jets are.
Randomize
