the beds are so narrow its like a jenga threesome
Just think, the more you drink, the more options you'll have of people you want to hook up with.
barbara walters just said penis...
new low, shannon just screamed FUCK THE IRISH to a 10 year old's face then proceeded to throw a hotdog at his parents. I think its time i take her home.
He raised his arm and dropped it in his sleep to smack himself awake. He knows his phone has an alarm clock right?
You said that when your ex gave you a blowjob her mouth was like velvet
I threw up in the kitchen on the floor and a guy tried cleaning it up with a spoon at a party.
You left a motherfucking bruise. ON MY TIT. How? How do you even. No.
i may or may not be making depth charges with cough syrup. i'll call you if i survive.
I don't know. Sometimes you can be a wild card with your emotions. Mostly the emotion known as anger.
Nobody wants to date "Eats Taco Bell Secretly In Her Car" Girl
I just interrupted this girl giving a dude head in a parked car on the south side. Going down on your guy while you're parked in front of your house because you don't want your parents catching you is fine by me, just don't block the fire hydrant.
So I woke and tried to get up. Then I realised my foot was stuck in the pocket of the pool table.
After you punched me you ran away and it took an hour to find you... On the wrong floor... Sitting alone saying "it doesnt make sense"
His idea of hot sex is sticking his finger in my dark star while doing me Missionary style. You can tell he's from the Bible Belt.
Does he smell like BBQ?
Inside and out.
Randomize
