piano lessons. No girlfriend. What's up.
dude wtf did we explode in my microwave last night?
idk but i think it had a face
Ummmm I went to see who was upstairs, he was the only one in his room so we had sex while the travel channel played in the background.
Oh good. Romantic. Still, I'm jealous of the sex.
Probably not, since he made me promise not to tell anyone it only lasted ten seconds.
There is no excuse for watching a Jesse McCartney movie.
after he came i started crying. just to fuck with his head.
she just came into my room, drunkenly shoved six dollars into my bra and told me to spend it on chicken wings.
Just saw a crackhead get taken down by pd in the canal. Its offically spring
She's currently celebrating her completion of "Sober October" with "Margarita Shit-Show November."
In other news I have discovered that grindr is the easiest way to get free meals
I have no idea what those words in that order meant, but if you go to Florida send me pics of strippers
SCOTCH AND CIGARS AT THE TITTY BAR. YOU ARE COMING WITH US.
Nothing warms my heart more than the sight of a naked hockey player in my bed.
I'm 22 and I'm drinking hawaiian punch from a sippy cup. Everything is right in the world.
So after we found out he wasnt throwing up blood in was just hawaiian punch and we all failed breathalyzers the cop drove us around like a taxi and brought us back to the apartment
All I ever wanted was my bed, Tylenol, and total darkness. Instead I had a pervert with porno posters who blares german rock calling me tootsie pop. How was your saturday night?
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