ok so the lil girl sitting behind u was picking the hairs off ur sisters back and putting them in her mouth
My life has hit rock bottom, I'm watching a movie on lifetime about retarded people falling in love. And I'm jealous of their relationship.
You were parading around the bar chugging girls drinks and then asking them if you could buy them a drink. It was actually genius
I just put a picture of what I imagine Rob's dick looks like on it on my vision board. thank you Oprah!
God my Facebook chat is a graveyard of old blowjobz
Call me next time you want to get irresponsibly drunk when we have grown up things to do the next day.
Which one of you fuckers thought itd be funny to see if the kitchen table can float.
Post a pic on facebook and see if those same 46 girls find shitting in the bed handsome and adorable
So I got hit in the face with a frying pan. So def wont be at work for first break if I'm there at all
You told me "I need to pound this drinks if I'm going to pretend his dick is big enough" then left. Dollar night quotes 2012
I left your tip in your mailbox. Last night was amazing.
This may be a weird question to ask someone who is 21 years old, but are you grounded?
Are you sexting with minion stickers right now?
Banging to Billy Joel pandora is like russian roulette. But I made him cum to Let It Be so I we both walked away victors
You talk the same way I hallucinate.
Randomize
