every time i send "do you want some cock" to her T9 manages to change it to "anal"...i think she's mad now
So are you the girl that gave me herpes? or was that the girl from the night before
i just sent my parents are gone come over I have condoms to my mom because Derek changed my numbers while I was passed out
you were watching a documentary about sharks and wouldn't stop stroking my legs and whispering "what if they could walk?"
Saying you want a bj does not count as saying you wanna see me btw.
Take your time, they're doing body shots off the dog.
For the record it's 1026 and you told me I could leave you in the bathroom.
She is feeding us popcorn out of her bra
I met her at the liquor store. I hope I'm wearing a condom
Wouldn't it be fantastic if the corporate world cared less about about our GPA and focused more on our mastery of social drunkenness?
Climbing out Mr. Friday night's bathroom window. He thinks I'm puking. Be on state st. with the getaway car and if you could bring me a shirt and some advil that'd be dandy.
So proud. See you in five. I've got coffee.
you took a potato out of your pocket and just started eating it raw. don't know where the potato came from though
21st birthday = success
Want a slice of this weekend's hottest piece of ass?
Woke up in time for my 8:15
Good for you I'm impressed
I realized 10 minutes in it was a class from last semester
I had a dream that you were telling me how good you are at parkour and legit you were doing it just like Michael Scott...
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