How was last night?
She looked like Delta Burke in her fat Designing Women days ... and she just left like 2 minutes ago. Right after breakfast.
Did you see the soccer ref give that girl the red card as she was being kicked out of the party?
You tried to convince her that if she gave you head she'd hear the ocean.....
Omg. The strippers are having a batman vs spiderman showdown. Both on stage. Genius.
he aplogized for the shitty sex and called me "ma'am" when he did it. And he wants redemption sex. Gah I love southern gentlemen.
The frequency that you give me blue balls couldn't be healthy.
We have been pregaming the shutdown of the government since Tuesday. Send help, and some more liquor.
Yeah I had to push her down the hallway to the hotel room in a luggage carrier. The guy at the desk told me goodluck
gorilla chasing a banana on crotch rockets. Halloween is getting way too real
He's all enlightened and liberal. My next beefcake will be much more Neanderthal.
the night was just a blur of sex and pie
In tonight's episode of Travis' Fucked up Sex Life, Travis breaks into a building at Tulane to have sex with an attractive Asian man.
It's brunch. If you find dick at brunch. You an A+ hoe.
I woke up naked next to my hot manager. Left before she woke up, and worked an entire shift with her. She has no idea.
ever feel bored AND lazy?
I call it "awake" but yeah...
Randomize
