there hasn't been a girl guy ratio this good since a guy jumped on one of the Titanic life rafts
i just did my hair and make up to walk our dogs.. I hate being the single roommate
My roommate has every episode of Full House. I'm going to fail my midterm tomorrow.
When she showed me how she could touch her toes without bending her knees, suddenly her face didn't worry me quite as much.
Just because you're using the Hipstamatic app for your nude photo taking, it doesn't make your drunken blowjob pics any classier.
I told the girl who was peeing in the garbage can she must have had a lot of upper body strength.
I vaguely remember chanting "USA" at the pool when we were talking to the Frenchies.
We were pointing at fat people and chanting USA.
And after we debated politics. My dream come true: naked, just got done having great sex with a hot mixed guy, talking about why social welfare programs are a bad idea
seriously, who doesn't want to get shitfaced and have sex to the backstreet boys?
also, sleeping with your chipotle guy sounds like a good idea until you want chipotle on your day off and have to look somewhat presentable to acquire said chipotle.
I have no idea what happened last night, but my pee is neon green.
he said he was going to fuck me like a rabbit in heat. What he should have said was faster then a train and over before a commercial
Um so I might have accidentally on accident maybe blew up the bottom half of your truck...
Sorry about you walking in on the whole nude kinect dancing. The new roomie was drunk and naked and told us he was either over dressed or we were under dressed for the party. And Amy figured it would be easier to join him than it would be to dress him
I think it's a bit on the nose for the Uber driver to play stairway to heaven while driving like A psycho.
Randomize
