Can't remember why I called but it definitely had something to do with Lou Bega
I'm going to an arts college, I live next to the frat houses, and my room number is 420. god has plans for me and I couldn't be happier.
if i found out she had a dick after i got head, does that still make me gay?
I think I'd do Clint Eastwood.
...kinda gettin a major gay vibe from you right now.
That was a text you sent me last night.
I looked at him all bewildered and he said, "what? I figured if it was under 30 seconds it'd be free."
Somewhere between yelling how am I gonna make it to my flight and more titie shots I stopped caring
How do you say "get out of my apartment" in Spanish. No time to explain, just tell me.
No, man, we stole the housekeeper's key and we're just going room to room raiding mini fridges. Hurry
Logan has the vodka and snickers. We're making a run for it. Room 302
I picked up a guy that night wearing a onesie. I kicked Xmas' ass
Omg one of the midgets from last night just added me to Facebook.
I don't think stranger penis made your tonsils bleed
True fear is being unable to remember where you hid your weed and vibrator in your parent's house.
Thanks for the hospitality last night.
You mean sex?
Yes....hospitality.
Just learned a very valuable life lesson. Never motorboat a cat when they have claws.
april was a good month for me, sexually...doubled my number, had a threesome, fucked a girl for the first time and two different boys in one night. there should be a medal
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