shes about as inviting as chlamydia
How do you feel about the band name "O'labia Newton John"??
i hope whoever thought of bagged wine flip cup last night has the same hangover as me. not ok.
Clothes are such an inconvenience.
The preggo girl brought her pet chipmunk to class today. fyi.
she hid the dish soap because she was afraid someone would confuse it with the margaritas and drink it instead. her reasoning was "theyre both soo pink...i cant tell them apart"
incase your class ends early, there are three naked guys in our room. but don't get too excited, they're all gay.
despite the cops showing up at 8am, pre gaming groundhog day was my idea yet. and by pre gaming, i of course mean getting black out drunk by 7:30am
Yep. My memoirs will be called "A Slore Worth Mentioning"
Its was awkward last year cuz in the middle of it her mom bust In the room with noise makers and champagne
Going to dump some dried Xanax powder into some Mac and cheese. Can't think of a better way to avoid tasting it.
That moment when your mom is so drunk she makes you get out of bed to lay in her bed because she thinks it feels like sleeping on a marshmallow peep....
You're a disaster
Wanna date?
Danny put 5 hr energy in the jungle juice (that brilliant bastard) and I almost showed my penis to Alex. It was a rough night.
So many questions so I’ll prioritize. How did I survive last night?
Randomize
