This girl looks like a mixture of kathy griffin and bill walton. i havent decided if that is a good thing.
I just punched cris angel in the balls. I have photos.
I've had a Margarita with salt, but I have to say I was impressed by the Stoli and Sprite rimmed with adderall
Woke up this morning 8 levels higher in Call of Duty then when I started drinking... told you I was better when I was drunk.
I probably wouldn't hook up with him if I had to deal with more than his penis. i think cumulatively we are up to a minute of actual conversation this week.
I think being a buddhist has made me a better drunk
his apartment was in a funeral home, walk of shamed through a visiation in the skankiest outfit i own
Maybe the downfall to liking really smart guys is that they're to smart to think about sex all the time.
Haha jealous. If I could remember my dreams I'm pretty sure they would constantly be about being drunk in foreign countries
The face that yo gabba gabba comes up when I'm stoned and searching for yoga workouts is scary or dangerous
Officially conquered sex on my couch with my dad asleep in the next room
I like how you say "conquered" as if that was your sole mission in life
Yeah. Moral of the story: Don't mace yourself. It sucks dick.
Wait, cocaine is okay but tanning isn't?
Have you ever given your heart and soul to someone and they turn out to be nothing but a great fuck that makes a mean grilled cheese because same
Why do we always have to be the people who get blamed for animal intoxication incidents?
Randomize
