Its ok relax. i can tell ur gonna start raggin. talk 2 u next week
I dont know why I dont listen to you more often. He wont stop texting me. And his signature is "dancing with no panties on"
they had a keg party to fund her abortion.
It's my fault there's ramen coiled around his penis.
We have a drunken confused pantless man in our apt. Boots.
Is it possible to get a DUI in a wheelchair that's not yours?
If you value my life, if you value your own, please look for that godforsaken cookie. Please.
i had choclate birthday cake for breakfast and am currently flossing my teeth w a condom wrapper. at work. hot mess for 200 alex
I told him I would only take his calls if he was dead, dying, capturing a midget, or buying me shots.
I stand by my new policy.
well, the two that sent pics I've already been with, so at least its not just BAM HERE'S MY PENIS IN YOUR INBOX ENJOY THOSE MEGAPIXELS
If he tries to stick his thumb up my butt again im going to rip his dick off with my vagina
I told you those kegels would come in handy one day
Beer and tomahawks! Not gonna end well!
Thank you for deleting me from Instagram. Also, I'm carrying your child. Happy new year!
You can't just walk around stealing hats from drunk boys and peeing in bathtubs. Turn down.
While we were having sex he asked me if I wanted to get wingstop after. I think I found my future husband.
Randomize
