why do they call them blowjobs? ....unless i'm doing it wrong?
It's American, baby! There ain't nothin gross about America.
He was crying to my sister about feeling like a bad person. Then he groped my breasts.
At barnes & noble, drinking beer out of thermoses, lookin legit.
so exactly what does one wear to an abortion clinic?
Just found my old bop it. So many drinking game possibilities
Got paid to make out with a girl. It takes skill to be this drunk and still make money
I have to bobbypin his pubes for us to have sex. The other day he wanted me to braid them.
so apparently going to a christian rock concert dressed as Jesus is horribly inappropriate.
My new best friend is the drag queen who works at mcdonalds and doesnt judge me during my walk of shame coffee break
I should have been on a postcard. I was sitting in the middle of the forest with a plate full of pot brownies and missing you.
There is a guy in class using a wine bottle as a water bottle. Welcome to the Faculty of Environment.
i can't even hate his new girlfriend cuz she survived a fucking brain tumor. like that's just not fair.
My ass is underappreciated
I am so sorry. Not sure for what, but whatever I did last night probably merits an apology, so I'm covering my bases.
Randomize
