When the moon hits your eye like a big pizza pie, you're a dumbass
we need to get ahold of those "sexting" teens on tyra. HAWT!
wasnt one 13?
There's a vagina buried somewhere in there.
you know how they say when you die, your whole life flashed before you? well do you get to see what happened all the nights you blacked out?
My vagina makes bad decisions like its her job
I don't know. I was also picked up by the doormen and held over the bar so I could do an upside down shot out of a bartenders tits.
Watched him slip somethin into her drink. Dragged him of his bar stool, punched him out, and told her what i saw. Bartender used some chemical to confirm presence of rophynol. Just woke up at her place
Definitely sounds like it's time for some eggs with a side of strap on
Your girlfriend is in jail- I've just never been able to use that in a sentence before. Thank you both!
Get off me. I'm done. I want a cookie.
Alls I wanted was a fun New Years but I end up fingering a geico sales representative on a futon and giving her a ride to work the next morning
I should have listened to my dad and mean girls... If you have sex you'll get pregnant and die.
I want to be tan and drunk. Is that too much to ask for?
Apparently I'm some kind of sexual camel.
I feel like i'm being yelled at when you type in all caps.Did you just have bad sex?
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