Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

ADVERTISEMENT

ADVERTISEMENT

ADVERTISEMENT

Sorry cerdnee hasn't picked any favorites yet.

ADVERTISEMENT

(710): View more from

Why do my orgasm prompt her to begin using babytalk EVERYTIME?!

Fav 12 802 4753
share tweet
(510): View more from California

come over. we are watching hoarders and playing i spy.

Fav 18 6133 1198
share tweet

ADVERTISEMENT

(901): View more from Tennessee

Someone carved 'Hank' in all caps in the snow outside my apartment building so naturally I turned the capital H into a K and added an S to the front.

(662): View more from Mississippi

I think college has really matured you.

Fav 19 4848 945
share tweet
(715): View more from Wisconsin

I don't know what part of vegas I'm in but its definately the wrong part

Fav 15 1284 4551
share tweet
(971): View more from Oregon

I can always tell its time to do laundry when my vibrator doesn't stay covered up in my sock drawer.

Fav 12 4840 1279
share tweet
(773): View more from Illinois

I really think we need to get on this Charlie Sheen bandwagon

Fav 10 3345 1387
share tweet

ADVERTISEMENT

(586): View more from Michigan

plus shes a stripper, ive been with strippers, if you fuck this up your penis will never forgive you

Fav 13 3033 1498
share tweet

ADVERTISEMENT

(813): View more from Florida

I'm in that weird half-dead, half fucked-simultaneously-in-every-orifice-by-a-bus-and-it-wasn't-a-good-time state.

Fav 1 732 1410
share tweet

ADVERTISEMENT

(619): View more from California

He sent me a pic of his coffee mug to be like "I'm having coffee too.” \nImagine that. Morning coffee. In your boring ass mug. Dick pic or gtfo.

Fav 0 39 33
share tweet

ADVERTISEMENT