you wouldnt answer to anything but devil's advocate all night.
i stuck my finger in my ass and it felt weird. but you know. it should be different when a guy does it right?
hey, i'm all for honesty but let's not get carried away
he just left. I blew him in my kitchen while my parents slept down the hall. Welcome back home!
he is like the poster child for std's. god i hope he meets a girl with teeth in her vag. that would serve him right
I swear to god if he wasnt on the fourth floor balcony and I wasn't to drunk to climb I would kill him
I'm currently making some changes in my life. If you don't hear from me anymore, then you're probably one of them. Or I'm dead.
Is this helping you get pumped up or am I going to have to send you more dick pics?
I wasn't vocally whispering "she wants to bite your dick off" about that kirsten girl was I?
I forgive you, at least you vote. I found out my fuck buddy isn't even registered. I won't fuck a non respectable citizen.
she said she wouldn't go home with me until she looked up my name in her sex offender app. do i really give off that vibe?
Yeah. It's not just the beard either.
Took his shirt off. Announced he was Jesus. Threw up. Asked me to cuddle him to sleep. And then tried to kiss me. Typical Saturday night.
I just want to give face wipes a shout out for being there when im too tired or high to wash my face at night
i woke up this morning put my hand under the pillow and there was a banana there
Im watching animal planet drunk, watching a documentary on mermaids. Tonight has not gone to waste.
Randomize
