I want to do you till i cant cum anymore. Till all i get is a little flag that says "bang".
We were making out in the bushes when some dude comes and starts peeing beside us.
I took her to see 2012 then broke up with her, the movie was a metaphor.
On a scale of 1 to last weekend, how hungover are you?
I swear every time I make the effort to make my hair look nice, someone jizzes in it.
I just made a steamroller out of a christmas ornament. I feel so festive.
I smoked a bowl while he ate me out, you need to change your major to match making asap. You are a guru of love.
My little brother just suggested we drink the rest of the vodka because it's raining. My job is complete.
Halfway through he got an idea for a short story so he wrote it in magic marker on my boobs. Yeah, he's a keeper.
I woke up at 5:47 in the morning to you peeing on my parents bedroom floor. I think we've established that you have a limit .
There is a hole in her door about 2 inch in diameter. You may see me on YouPorn
Halloween is the only night where I would ever end up getting a guy's makeup all over my face
I'm excited for you as you venture towards new drug experiences
I'm good. Got my nipples pierced and threw my back out. 🙌
He woke up and decided to go for a swim in the lake... At about 3am... With his dogs
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