I would drag my balls through a mile of broken glass to eat pudding out of her anus
All i remember as you were making ramen is that you kept slurring "i like you as a color"...
My mouth holds just enough water for my bong
I cant believe you went home with her.. Your poor immune system and the shit you put it through.
I wore a firefighters hat and drank beer all night. They had to drive me home after breaking the beer pong table, they told me I was welcome back tonight though...
Just made a PowerPoint called "Reasons Why You Should Fuck Me" at his request. The sad thing is we've had sex before...
This guy is walking around with a deer head on. Honestly what the fuck
I have got to stop taking so many uppers and downers simultaneously. My life is a Dali painting.
I can't sleep. Send Llama pictures.
i also remember watching someone vomit off a balcony which was kind of grim
I just bought six bottles of the 2 dollar vodka. oh yes there will be blood
I'm going to force her to break up with me this week. Tonight I plan to shit the bed. If that doesn't work I'm not sure what's next.
What happened last night? All I know is that I walked into class this morning and everyone was chanting my name.
They made Game of Thrones Oreos. Kill me.
Its like Gods punishment for wanting to party
Randomize
