Last day of classes. 1st day attending every class. I'm proud of myself
Excuse me by sucking dick i am fighting crime. Just think of all the prostitues going out of business and getting real jobs.
She said that I needed to "pregame her so it can slip right in."
when i got home i made myself toast with butter & put pasta on it. I know this cause it's all over my bed.
I can do it, this is my punishment and I will accept it, plus id like to see the look on peoples faces when I throw up on them
Just quiet vomiting, and in between heaves she mumbled "be the pro"
Its what im here for. Critiquing penis photos.
I've lost all respect for marriage since I joined this bachelor party.
We had to go to his parents last night for dinner & ended up having a quickie in the bathroom while everyone else was outside smoking.. This is why we have a successful marriage.
He is really real. Like I know where he works, have referenced him with mutual fb friends and I've seen his dick. He's real.
You merely adopted the alcohol. I was born into it. Molded by it. I didn't see the hang over until I was a man and by then it was only blinding.
he kept insisting he didn't have my number, so i called his phone and my number came up as "yeaaaaaaaaah!"
Last night I made him sit on my bed and finish my burrito bowl as I chanted "brucey" over and over until he was done like they did in Matilda with the chocolate cake
I found where he bartends and I guarantee you that in approximately nine months from this Friday, you will have a niece
We were high and the scary movies were scaring us too bad. Were all watching porn instead now
Randomize