Sometimes when I see pregnant women, I wonder what position they were in when they got knocked up. Then I gag a little.
So what's the moral of this story? Aside from 'lesbians hold grudges'?
And as you crawled into the bathroom last night you repeatedly said "I know the routine".
Too bad it's not "confirm, ignore or not unless I've had 20+ beers"
you said you get the best orgasms off Pez dispensers. how do you think he felt????
she bought me drinks at the bar, made me pizza at her place, gave me head, and then drove me home...i think i might propose
Either I'm losing my touch or ED is running rampant in 20 something men now
Also I'm 95 percent positive we ate food naked together
I had to throw a towel over the bottles cuz it hurts to look at them
He busted his lip while trying to keep from passing out in the pool. The hotel people don't seem to be too concerned that we're passing around a bottle of SoCo at 11 am.
You insisted on going outside so you could "breathe real air".
I would have cried, probably tears of wine, but cried nonetheless.
She sleeps with her hand around my balls. First I thought it was just a comfort thing. Now I think it's to make sure I can't slip away in the middle of the night.
So I'm at early voting and the group of ladies behind me is talking about voting no on 2 and my gummy is kicking in, thank lawd
I got here. Mom yelled "drink of the day is blueberry sangria" and next thing I knew I was on a slip and slide.
Randomize
