She has some nice fakeys. She is also an exotic entrepreneur.
There's a fat drunk walrus bitch here next to me and shes already puked and now falling on herself
OH FUCK NOW HER BOYFRIEND IS MAKING OUT WITH HER VOMIT HOLE
Sounds like a good blink 182 concert...
I fucking love fucking science majors-- she told me that she wanted to know if her gag reflex got better or worse with alcohol, and that her initial evidence had been inconclusive. So, next few weeks, yeah, gettin blown periodically. All I have to do is keep a log.
I'd steal beers with my tail. If I were a monkey.
There is a semi-attractive guy at the door who's looking for you. Says he met you on Chatroulette. Start explaining NOW.
The camp director doesn't care if we drink and i'm running the rifle range. Someone is going to get sued.
I just want you to know that I hid the weed. Once you find another job, I'll tell you where it is. Happy Hunting, bro.
No more Raisinettes before sex. That's what happened. I just put it together
Why is there an ambulance refusal in my pocket? I'm never going drinking with you again.
Oh yeah. I pretty much fucked the universes brains out lastnight. It was glorious.
I've decided that it's a bad thing. But I've also decided that I don't give a fuck.
Hooked up with a straight guy while dressed as a man. I'm unstoppable.
I am literally so hung over that I just opened up my emergency kit, got out a survival meal replacement bar and ate it.
It got to the point where I was so drunk, playing rock paper scissors as a drinking game seemed like a good idea.
She totals her lexus and all she wants is to have crazy wild sex.
Randomize