found out what b.m.t stands for.
what did you think?
bread, meat, tomatoes, but then i realized that could be practically any sub.
You drinking a lot?
No.
Define a lot
You asked the dj to play 'who let the dogs out" because it was your birthday. You left the bar and then re-entered to the song
i've decided to use this saturday afternoon to take care of my pube situation
Nothing like studying in the College of Communication to make you realize how smart you are.
she was giving me head and that cheryl crow 'youre favorite mistake' song came on. she looks up and all i could do was nod
Thats two for two birthdays where I've gotten the "alcoholism runs in the family" speech
Lost gin update. Blackout me found and re-hid the bottle. Left a note to myself saying, "GOOD LUCK, SUCKER!"
He left npr on the whole time when we were doing it. ironic that i lost it on the 100th anniversary of the titanic. thanks michelle norris.
Shits getting dirty between us in her dad's bedroom. I'm talking early millennium rap and r&b
I can affiliate each flavor of Copenhagen to a different one night stand. I really love Texas.
He saved you from those guys at the club, took you home, and made you breakfast. If this isn't your come to Jesus moment IDK what is.
Everyone called me "Barf Vader".. And I lost your lightsaber.
I’m going to fail his daughter so she stays in my class and I can keep fucking him. BEST. ORGASMS. EVER.
Then you can teach the kid to be a home wrecker
that blonde bartender and I racked up an impressive mini bar bill last night
Mini bar? Did you get a hotel room?
Yeah, the last thing I need right now is a chick with an insane clown posse tattoo knowing where I live
That’s legit
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