we should start having sex in the shower. less clean up.
if someoen knew that someone accidentally drunkly kissed your boyfriend would you want them to tell you/?
followup question: what if both somones were me?
we just ha sex. he lasted two minutes. i told him to leave because i had class
isnt today saturday?
Blowjobs in the shower are a lot like blowjobs not in the shower. Awesome.
I said "have a good day officer and I'll see you friday when I get arrested for being too drunk.."
You got the eggs out of the fridge and yelled "my chickens are beasts at making eggs" and then pegged them at the ceiling and at a couple who were making out
I feel like I just tasted lung cancer.
Hey to make you feel better about last night, I just shit my pants.
He must have found my secret supply of blow and took a bump before we left the house. Rude.
He could of at least asked
Nothing. Its like my body doesn't know how to function on a Saturday when its not hungover and/or still drunk.
All I can think about are the cheese it's on my desk at work this morning. Like are those apologetic cheese it's or does he seriously think he still has a shot..
Hey, it's all about finding the bright side. And boobs are definitely a bright side.
Life if anyone rolls up to my funeral with shitty weed get them out of there
It baffles me why I still wear white underwear...
I need to bang the neighbor boy. He’s given three women screaming orgasms this week alone.
Also, my apartment walls are too thin
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