i am sorry to ask, but i need y0ur honest opinion . when i turn sideways to someone, does my nose stick out like a beak ?
just had a dream there were parent teacher conferences in college...scariest dream ever.
she said her black crocs were her 'dress up crocs'
This is the guy who showed up to the first day of class with a 24 pack of coke and a handle of rum in his backpack. He doesnt play by normal people rules.
Like what kind of adult things? Whats more adult than drinking at 2pm on a monday?
Called Jeff last night and told him I wanted to have sex in the airport terminal. Blackout Brooke definitely came out last night.
whoever brushed my teeth and whitened them while i was passed out, thanks.
He was so drunk he was throwing the bowling balls into other lanes on purpose. He still beat my high score thought.
Please tell me that is you having sex in my car in my driveway and not a complete stranger.
Body shots with my MILFs MILF!!
All I did was send my mom an ecard
I want to just live in between your butt cheeks.
There is a video recording of my birth. I have seen it. It is terrifying.
Weight watchers just said "you've tracked beer three times recently, want to make it one of your favorites?" I'm begining to understand why I needed to go in the first place.
At least I’m an “essential employee” and can still bang my boss. \n\nFingers crossed my husband doesn’t ask why I’m essential, the orgasms are too good to give up during this pandemic
Have you considered murder?
Other than my credit score and this bowl of oatmeal, not really. It's very messy
Randomize
