Okay I've seen like three girls walking around crying today. Weird?
everyone's regretting their thursdays.
I'm pretty sure my penis yawned halfway through. That loose.
just upper decked a verizon store cause they don't cover against "getting phone crushed by a keg." had to pay 175 for a new one
He was the drug dealer that jumped out of his car to get my number
i wanna pet his head its so fluffy. were gonna open a petting zoo
Count me out. I seem to have semen induced blindness in one eye.
If you were curious as to how many pounds of bagged marijuana can fit in the trunk of a 2010 Chevrolet Aveo, we now have the answer
we have to top last new years. except im not ready for jail. that can wait a couple years
We have 24 days left before I leave for college and 21 condoms left in the stockpile. Are you up for the challenge?
What is this nonsense on the table
Your idea.
I mean the hole taco that was chewed up and spit out
WAIT MOM THIS DOESNT NEED TO BE A FAMILY EVENT OK AARON DOESNT NEED TO BE AROUND FOR NIPPLEGATE 2014
I find celibacy oppressive. Huge waste of my time and talents.
Sitting in a waiting room with 15 children has me contemplating if I ever want to have sex again...
If you get banged by this bartender you know you can't be mad at me right? Its the rules.
I have filthy fantasies involving his tongue. My vagina almost exploded while he was licking that ice cream cone.
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