too bad you live with your parents still
'Watching yourself cry on Photobooth' is the new 'watching yourself cry in the mirror.'
she called my cock the "semen sword" and then we invented a position called excalibur
Anytime you have a hot, flirty, married woman that wants to ride you like a horse and slap your ass, you've got to do it.
Yeah, but four times?
I only have two new blunt burns this year as opposed to freshman year's 6. This is growing up.
i had to wake up at 4 am to do my laundry because I was afraid if I saw people in the laundry room they would judge me by the amount of clothes I had covered in vomit from syllabus week
Also I may have a condom stuck inside me, but I won`t know til I check the couch coushions.
my knee is completely bruised from kneesliding into the bowling ball. bowling for creativity points was a win
Just come here and visit. Enjoy the deliciousness of me being legal. Just don't think, and come here right meow. meow meow meow.
Handicvap rails on the toilet atre soooooo fuckin handy right nmow.
Urgent. Do not ignore. What does this "=$" shit mean. Quality foreign dick is at stake here
I haven't seen her in probably 3 months and when she showed up wasted to my house she promptly pulled out her tit
I preemptively put on a cape before eating a bunch of weed brownies. Best decision ever.
Yes please. My parents would fucking love him and I'd love fucking him. That's a win-win if I've ever seen one.
You kept crying and I couldnt help but laugh at you, I was really high though.
Randomize
