Needless to say when I told my parents they loved me less
I think your x's eyes are broken his new girl is so hit
god. i hate danny gokey.
Hes like the kid in school that reminds the teacher they forgot to assign homeowrk.
he's mormon right? lame.
He yelled GOOOOAAAALLL when he came.
I dunno if we should get high tonight man. its daylight savings. time travel is just too much for me right now.
So my bf wanted to cum on my face and I let him. Afterwards I wiped some off, wiped it across his forehead and said, "The king has returned".
God I love incriminating evidence...wonder what the statue of limitations is on shitting on someones driveway
I just want to let you know that when you try and lie about the "solid 10" you brought home last night, I've got a picture of her and about 10 reasons you should have left her at the bar starting with those martin scorsese eyebrows.
Just had a VERY VIVID visualization of wrapping a pizza around my cock and fucking its brains out. Soooooo less weed more dates?
I think this bruise on my arm is actually an impression of your face
First time since we broke up that I'm not drunk before noon...win for broken hearts everywhere
He was telling me how he was trying to grow up. And then 2 minutes later, he told me he was tripping on lsd for the first time.
I just realized it's officially fall..I had sex while watching Halloween
I wanted to say "you're a souless cunt" but in a nice way. So I added a smiley face.
I'm really busy with my period
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