Kenny Powers is just a normal guy with exceptional hair
umm..so Dad's wearing a thong, I don't know what to do
put a dollar in it?
Last night you told her she was rocking the beer gut. Still wondering why you have that black eye?
A picture just appeared on facebook. I am puking in the toilet, you are next to me puking in the sink. I think we have our christmas card.
I dont know, my roommate got arrested but I'm gunna get some tacos no matter what
Also, the drinking age in Japan is 20. At what point in the sky am I allowed to start downing alcohol?
I woke up with her dog licking the wedding cake out of my ear and her sister finishing our Jaeger
I text him "Dude. Tryna get fucked here. I only have half the parts. I need your help" I'm sure my mom would be super proud of the woman I have become.
Do u remember giving me permission to fuck ur dad and then getting super pissed at me when i said ew?
i was sitting in the back of a squad car completely stoned watching airplanes take off
my throat is bruised, my back is scarred, my vagina feels like it's going to fall off.. you're like godzilla. you destroy everything.
Will you be super villain lesbian lovers with me for halloween?
At one point we were both in the bathroom and i was taking a shit while holding your hair as you puked in the sink. Friendship.
If you find me in the bathroom in a fetal position, licking frozen bacon .. I might have Drank a little too much.
I made out with 4 out of 4 girls I was out with last night, I'm pretty sure everyone knows I'm a lesbian by now
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