its like my vagina has this homing beacon out to all the guys saying "come find me, i havent been shaved in weeks"
I wouldn't necessarily call it an addiction, more of a passion. I'm habitually passionate.
So there is a guy driving a robot around the college of engineering selling energy drinks
My mother's day gift to my mother is to promise never to tell her 95% of the stories I've accumulated in my life.
I found bruises on my neck from barfing out the window.
I think I just used lyrics from the Sister Sister theme song to let a guy down easy...
You were walking away to pee and as you were undoing your belt you looked at me and said "the belt is off. the game is on. Remever that."
I am drinking green tea.... My liver is in shock
Well I met my booty call's parents by accident, so that happened.
Getting blackout drunk infront of my family was never on my bucket list, but now that I've done it I'm cool with it.
he asked if he should bring the trash can into the room.. apparently i shoved my finger all over his face and said.. shhhh dont talk... just take your pants off.
So then edible panties?
Jesus no he likes candy too much, I'd lose a lip
I'm not sure what happened. There's a frozen waffle in the floor and he's walking around with a curtain rod and making planes out of bread slices...
When you're as high as I am right now brushing your teeth is both magical and fucking terrifying
I came twice AND he sent me home with edibles. I think he’s a keeper.
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