Small dicks are the new regular sized dicks.
I need to stop researching the drugs I do on Wikipedia. The parts about abuse and dependency hit too close to home
Did I tell you that you looked cute last night? I looked at the pictures. I lied.
I just walked by that girl who tried to commit suicide over me in high school. That was weird.
At home depot. Final room inspection is tmrow, gotta paint over the puke stains
My mind hurts. I feel like I drank sand yesterday.
thanks for being the calm eye of my shit storm.
I honestly don't know if ill make it through the next two hours. The hangover is strong with this one.
I have her designated blowjob hair tie on my wrist. It's like a key to eternal happiness
Standing here wondering if its a good idea to cook pork chops in the toaster or not.
Where are you on a scale from one to wasted?
Like alphabetically I'd say a v
please come here right now, that girl who always gets her boob out is here and she brought taco bell
It was the needle in the haystack of teary, unpleasant handjobs.
Who the fuck watches Jessica jones and thinks I need to call a past fling?
I JUST WANT TO HAVE AWKWARD SEXUAL EXPERIENCES WITH HIM.
Randomize
