i'm sick of taking my pants off and seeing a look of disappointment on the girls face. i want her to be frigthened
I just want to hang out with her.
You're a liar. Why do I have to give you reasons you can't have sex with my mom? I hate you.
I feel like I should limit myself to one meal prepared from a box per day
woke up this morning to find the entire staircase covered in marinara sauce, with my roommate practically sobbing and scrubbing the wall with carpet cleaner.
Her boyfriend was hitting on other girls while drunk. But, she said she was okay with it because she is a feminist and she supports all women's decisions.
You're doing that 'overestimating how much I care' thing again.
I just found my "random bang list for summer of 2012" that I wrote last night.. It's written on a Plan B receipt. If this isn't irony I don't know what is.
Do you have any pix of it limp? I wanna see the metamorphosis, like a cock caterpillar turning into a giant beautiful cock butterfly!
You're not stopping till I see you on the ground trying to hold on to shit
I'm drinking with a guy who is a bigger asshole than me. We started a contest.
I chugged that bitch with a dip in.
You somehow managed to be a man whilst drinking a Mike's Hard. I commend you.
for some reason leaving your socks onmakes it less meaningful.
I decided to do drugs in front of her because if anyone can handle the truth it's a ghost
Step 1: Buy a house Step 2: Turn bedroom into sex dungeon
Sorry I didn't have my phone all night. Did we hang last night?
You bit me
Oh lord I need to hear this story
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