I texted him about a book we both like. I was expecting a "ya great book... let's bone" response. It didn't work
Well, I fucked her. But the sex wasn't all that great. Morning sex never is
you woke up and yelled "the tv is moving" and fell on the floor and passed back out
you came home soaking wet, and when I asked where your umbrella was, you pulled it out of your bag and were so proud you kept it dry.
After he came he asked what I was doing for thanksgiving.
are we at that level where i can tell you your girlfriends tits looked really good yet?
I dont know, but the way you were flopping around and gurgling made me scared that you were actually drowning in the carpet.
On a lighter note, the guy I gave a lap dance to then fell asleep on his crotch just facebook friend requested me..
So there I was praying he didn't go limp again, choking on a long, long gray ball hair. This is my Saturday night. This. Is. My. Life.
tonight were gonna drink champagne and watch girls put themselves in awkward position
That's like.....u just dangled a sex carrot in front of me then took it away!
So much rum. So many feels.
just put a ruler in a cup trying to measure how much ivve had to drink..... God help me
i now know why i keep getting pictures of poop. apparently someone put my number in a girls bathroom saying i am a poop lover.
you text any of them back? this is probably the most women you'll ever have texting you in your life. don't squander a good thing
yeah we're all naked, and I think we just shaved Chad.
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