quick i need to know how implid consent works for golf carts
too late i think im gettin a gcui
I think its a sure sign I need to get laid when every cloud in the sky looks like a penis.
I'm using process of elimination to determine which of our neighbors i fucked last night.
Pretty sure I just became the first person ever to use the word "boner" in a wedding card...
Wat the fuck dude ketchup in my bong???
Happiness for him is a different happiness than you can supply cuz you have life standards, morals and goals that dont include the bar or beer everynight.
It was so cute that he apologized for getting cum on my couch. If he realized how many guys had cum on that couch in the past year, he wouldn't have touched my vagina with a 10-ft pole.
Well, you've continued the theme of living with people who's dicks I've sucked.
Lmfao. We asked what you wanted to eat and you said vagina. I don't care what kind. Fresh, barbecue, roasted on a camp fire. I just want it on my taste buds.
Besides you're a Tennessee fan and it'd be against my religion to have your penis inside me today.
The amount of times I have been emergency drunk in the past 72 hours is staggering
Come get your boyfriend. He is hammered talking to me about hot dogs and casinos.
heβs basically the devil with a fuck boy hair cut and chlamydia
She was going down on me before I had a chance to tell her I arrested her brother 3 hours earlier
Good news!! I can adult!! π turning down the strip club on a weeknight has become my crowning achievement ππ
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