If you had to guess, would you say that as a species, midgets are more or less flammable than humans?
Less. Duh. They have less combustible mass.
i told him i was gay. he said that gay guys are supposed to be pretty.
I briefly wondered why they weren't in school, but after the tinier one shouted "check out dem titties!" I had my answer
I just wanna lay in my bed all bundled up as have someone feed me lettuce
I hate cuddling. I also hate when people breathe. Which he did, a lot. So he can go to hell.
i'd say i'm about at weeping-uncontrollably-in-a-puddle-of-my-own-tears-and-urine level
Tiny.
I mean tony. It's like autocorrect knows he wasn't well endowed.
Just gave a blow job while wearing a shirt that says 'world's coolest mom' idk how my conscience feels...
when I went into his room, he was sleeping on his stomach, almost as if to silently say, "you're not touching my dick tonight".
Children cease to be precious when they crap their shorts in the pool I exercise at.
Dude, where are you?
In back
of car
... whose car?
Is it bad that I want a job purely so I can buy drugs with without feeling like I am sacrificing my future?
Why do you think I have a job?
I don't know what to do with my life other than going on Reddit and watching porn.
It was probably bad to sleep with someone just to pet his dog right?
I often worry that if I get famous, people from my past will recognize me and start talking to the media
Randomize
