If your 8 lb baby was ham it would serve 6-8 people
he's a bartender at a gay strip club. maybe he can work his magic. with getting u in, not gay magic.
Swear. I think after passing out in a community college parking lot I can safely nominate myself for the piece of shit of the year award
i mean he wasn't bad looking, but i wouldn't have slept with my professor if i knew everyone would get an A
Watching Fresh Prince at 9am with a beer in hand and he just said to Uncle Phil "Sometimes I worry that I'll never get my life together." I feel like that was a sign from above or something
You just kept saying "they don't make cigarettes for squirrels. Yet."
So I just told the bartender I would go down on her. You need to get here
Dude id rather jerk off w a fist full of bee's than deal with that girl that never stops talking.
She's drunk as hell locked up I. The bathroom with my shoes where do I go from here
Are u guys proud? I puked my brains out last night at a strip club. While my two fave strippèrs held my hair
No more chicken and waffles served by drag queens at 2 AM. :(
Also if i get drunk and start crying about the elephants you all have my permission to abandon me.
you don't even have a vagina so you don't get to tell me what to put in mine
You call it sex. I call it penis conditioning.
I think this is the first time I heard a lesbian version of baby it's cold outside.
Randomize
