Is it wierd that I kind of wish I could hang out with Melissa Joan Hart?
i cant believe i hit a parked car with a pink dildo in my mouth... fuckin epic
All of my current injuries can be related back to sex.
He posted a picture of my bra on facebook with the caption "I don't know who I hooked up with last night but if this is yours please come pick it up".
So he was supposed to be helping me with my math but instead we ended up drinking coconut rum in his basement and having sex. I think my mom was right, getting a tutor will be good for me. Relieves the stress.
Well if you're drunk enough to make some mistakes this week I'd be down to redeem myself for my poor performance.
I woke up naked under desk at her apt once during my freshman year. I should have known that friendship was of a different breed...
I don't know what I was talking about but I just threw up in ikea. You can't get out of this place it's a fucking labyrinth.
He can't just hit it and quit it and then eat your pop tarts on his way out.
Do exhausted, barely concealed hand jobs count as joining the mile high club?
I'm super depressed and stressed and I just want spaghetti and sex...
Hun your dick isn't big enough for you to be that lame and predictable
I've also stopped shaving, like, everything. I can't tell if I'm empowered or sad
There's a possibility I may have hooked up with that British guy...
Possibility? You left the door open! Everyone saw!
I woke up with sticky red stuff all over my sheets, face, and chest. Apparently after I blacked out I thought eating ribs in bed was a good idea
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