Just got my rental car in Iowa...gas is under 2 dollars in des moines...this is not a real state
Nothing says true friendship like 2 people bonding over potentially having AIDS.
omfg. get on facebook. the science olympiad team had a rave.
I don't want to smoke with her when she's on adderall. She carved her pumpkin for four hours & didn't say a word.
he grabbed my head and said "you are a horse. I am leading you to water" pushed it down and whispered "Drink."
Going to have to start putting down newspaper if puking the bed is going to be a habit
who am I kidding I don't have any dignity. Plus we're not doing a porno, we're just doing random things naked
I can feel the fear and stress bubbling in my stomach. Or maybe that is the pregnancy.
OMG bikini contest at the bar. You can see this one chicks scar from her c-section and I'm pretty sure she is the best of the bunch.
I was afraid that she would smell her boyfriend's penis on my breath while we were talking.
I just found out the guy that lied and blew me off got arrested, his mugshot is online. Life is good.
I think I left my chapstick at your house when I tried using your penis as a catapult and flung it on the floor. Be a dear, and try to see if you can find it.
I forgot that places existed where drinking on Sunday is frowned upon. It's just so unreasonable.
Hooked up with a girl in the dorm laundry room tonight. And got invited to go to Vegas for free. That's how today's going.
The fact that I made out with a twenty one year old father is kind of worrying me now. Like. This is exactly what I wasn't supposed to do in life.
Randomize