Time to put an end to this 'unprotected sex with crazy girls who have violent exes' trip I've been on so far this summer
just saw an anti-abortion rally outside of the courthouse...so naturally i tossed them out a coat hanger i found in my car
DO NOT FUCK HIM ON MY BEAN BAG CHAIR
you think she would figure it out that ever dude that fucks her is just doing it bc they are in a contest to bang the fattest girl
He woke up licked his hand and put it on my vag and went back to sleep. This is twice this week and its only wednesday
my stepmom is let-the-dog-eat-out-of-her-mouth drunk. oh my god.
Just realized I lost my social security card...maybe someone else will do something with my life
I just puked my brains out on the side of the road (see picture) And I took a picture for our scrapbook! I am always thinking! =) tell me your proud?!
A guy is going to be inside me and I'm gunna start singing "I am stuck on your penis, cause your penis is stuck in meeee!"
Bless her heart. Her stupid, drunk, adderall-ed heart.
Omg how many tall cans is too many tall cans for 1 pm
ALSO I MAYBE ACCIDENTALLY HAND CUFFED MYSELF TO A CHAIR
Could you just like have a friend who feels bad for me and secretly always wanted to have sex with me
I never thought I'd say this but there's too many dicks around here.
And I mentioned the burning debate about your circumcision in my Christmas card to your mom.
Randomize
