She looked like cheddar but tasted like limburger...
Odds of those being real?
One in who gives a fuck
Man in California was arrested for killing and eating a wild bobcat while high on crystal meth. Let's please NEVER get that high on anything...
it was fucking weird. cops showed up but they appreciated our 3 story bong. and then some girl tried to steal our cheese and butter
And I also succeeded in getting kicked out of a bar when I was drinking straight from the vodka bottle at our table.
I really don't think there's anything more liberating than farting.in a loud bar where no one.can.hear you
Jungle juice turns everything into a pickup line. All I said was "do you play chess" and somehow I got laid.
Let's be honest, I am pretty sketchy looking.
I'm highly inebriated watching star wars, this text was sent via the force
I just spent the last three days trying to hook up with a dude for his pool privileges
Yeah,I'm just gonna keep fucking other guys til this idiot figures out he loves me.
Like seriously, I would not be going if there wasn't pizza
Great... now even my dreams are making fun of me
I knew the bike rally would be fun when I saw "male pole dancing" on the schedule
I. Am. Not. Tattooing. My. Penis.
Randomize
