just looked at his mug shot... not really my type
And i laid in the yard with carrots on my chest cause i wanted a bunny
i spent 45 minuets spilling my heart out to him telling him i was in love with this other guy sorry. when i was done he asked me to give him a blow job. i did. i have commitment problems
we weren't quite sure what was on that mirror, so we snorted it and hoped for the best
Managed to get through family dinner without anyone knowing I was tripping balls. Christmas miracle. He exists.
Me and this 7 year old almost finished a large pizza. And when I say me and this 7 year old I really mean me.
I drunkenly took 3 laxatives last night since I felt fat.... this is going to be a rough morning
I just used a VHS tape as a plate for sanwich
just really comprehended the fact that I'm getting high at the same place I used to play as a child. the nostalgia and thc is mixing together in one, intense wave. WHO HAVE I BECOME
As I read your response saying I need a tan before I can become a go-go dancer, a girl cane up to work and gave me 10 coupons for 100 days of tanning for a dollar.
This is fate. You were destined to be a stripper.
You very well can't change your mind now. It would upset the natural flow of life.
GET ME OUT OF HERE THE DOCTOR KNOWS HE IS JUDGING ME I DEMAND A PRISON BREAK
We peed on campus in the middle of the tailgate and then hit on a married cop that asked you to stop touching him
I need to you to send me drugs via FedEx
Just calling to thank you for not dying. I love you.
I got my period on eclipse day. I'm officially in line with the moon.
Randomize