I am so fucking pissed, there are no Shamwows in the As Seen on TV Store.
Looks like you'll have to stick to jizzing in socks.
some dude is getting blown right outside the bar in his car. reeediculous
class
he's dribbling her head like he's fucking allen iverson
There's a fat drunk walrus bitch here next to me and shes already puked and now falling on herself
OH FUCK NOW HER BOYFRIEND IS MAKING OUT WITH HER VOMIT HOLE
Sounds like a good blink 182 concert...
so the sex was amazing up until the point where she said "wow, you're even better than your dad!"
Exactly how deep of a burn should you have when you pee before becoming legitimately concerned?
I'm naming my child veloci raptor. And you can be a part of its life if you want. But that's its name. Cause i have the vagina.
i walked into the party and i guess everyone knew because they began to chant "ass to mouth"
We convinced her the game "just the tip" was a billiards game. She was asking a couple guys if they wanted to play as we left. I kinda don't want to ask her how the rest of the night went.
Oh, and that ugly chick transformed into a veritable goddess when she came back at 3AM with a handle of vodka and 100 chicken wings
Did you sleep with Connor? And who undressed me? There's a picture of two guys peeing out my bedroom window. What happened?
They just showed up to the party with a shopping cart full stolen of naty ice cans, no boxes, just cans. Shit just got real !
I'm making mistakes. Coming up with girl now
I hate me. That girl was hiiiiideous.
He made me choke him and call him Papi..so all in all a good night.
please tell dad to clear the porn off his tablet before he lends it to anyone from now on
Me and some guy are crying in a port a potty together after another guy broke up with both of us.
Randomize
