somehow, due in part to drug cocktail and alchl prior to meeting, i blacked out, got home, made total mess of kitchen, broke shower, and made 17 hard boiled eggs
I thought you said his peep was too small
it is but i have no money and nothing is on tv until 7 when americas next top model comes on.
I can't remember last night. I must have yelled at your girlfriend til she cried again.
Yup.
you were having sex in the bathroom so i pee'd in your bong water...
she worked me into her spring break cardio plan. im mondays and wednesdays.
Also, putting laundry hampers on my head and pretending I'm an astronaut is a good way to get caught in every door frame in the house.
He doesn't care. He wouldn't care if my vag grew arms and smacked him in the face.
i thought you were just a really comfy body pillow until i sobered up. oops.
Dad's teaching me to make moonshine this weekend as "college prep". How scared should I be sis?
she's fucked both of my roommates but not me. i feel like I'm not part of the group anymore
Props to you. You took the bet seriously. Making out with her for an hour right after she spewed
I just shaved my pubes into a heart shape. if that doesn't scream romantic idk what does
I see you listening to my get shitfaced playlist on spotify. glad we're on the same page tonight there's a drink waiting for you downstairs.
This is a long quiet interstate without somebody to sext.
MDMA, margaritas, mashed potatoes and ice cream aren't keto Kristin
Randomize