I need to talk to you about an important matter involving lesbians.
Lets date for the summer
what?
Dont love me in September.
Come on the kid is gayer than me
Like the straightest thing he could do right now is take it up the butt
I was passed out on the couch, she literally cut my boxers off with a 8" chef's knife and had her way with me.
My dinner was lean cuisine and tequila. Aaaaaand I need a boyfriend.
His car is carseat is compatible. I checked while we were banging in the back seat...
He looked at me and said "Last call" before putting his penis away into his boxers
He picked me up from the airport wearing nothing but a trench coat and a bow on his dick
I don't believe u have enough text space to describe the dimensions of his penis.
What I'm trying to say is, that time you chained me to my dresser and made me beg for it was incredibly romantic.
LinkedIn just suggested I might know the guy I caught my wife fucking.
He told me to keep watching the Grammys and then went down on me.. I think I'm in love.
There's a weed, money and oreo filled pinata promised for our party.
i like coming up with different names when i reference that night. 'the night i got kicked out of the bar', 'the night i escaped from the hospital', 'the night we had that threeway'...
So you're willing to shred any respect that you had for your body on some random chick who's only looking for sex? That's the worst thing I've ever heard.
I mean, it won't be 100% meaningless, I know her middle name.
Randomize