May have just accidentally purchased an iphone on Kate's credit card. This has potential to be bad.
READY
for what?
TO HAVE SEXXXX
i think you have the wrong number
And that's when I found out that Patrick wasn't in fact down with O.P.P.
In less than 3 minutes we had 3 security guards running after us
then she kicked a hole in her own door and the next thing you know, brian's walking up to her room with power tools. in no condition to use them
My vagina supports interfraternal relations
She just admitted to me that she was a pinecone.
I just saw that blonde chick you wanna bang rolling down the hall wearing a Thor mask..
Wow. We're meant to be..
He's scared I want a relationship? How does texting him at three am and sleeping with four of my exes symbolize that?
He didn't call me beautiful but he came in less than five minutes so same thing, right?
Just laying in bed with my vibrator eating cold tortillas and listening to Savage Garden.
He looked me deeply in the eyes and said "I don't want this to be the last time I see you.. Can I follow you on Instagram"
Santa tracker drinking game, you in or what?
YOU ARE THE ONLY PERSON I KNOW THAT STEALTH CLEANS PEOPLE TOILETS
This is bullshit, I shit my pants for the 1st time in 30 years, stuck on the 405, fuck this shit.
Depends
Randomize
