I'm chasing vodka with french fries.
I'm going to an arts college, I live next to the frat houses, and my room number is 420. god has plans for me and I couldn't be happier.
Stage 55 clinger. not a typo. I cannot even believe this shit.
I literally need to be slapped with another cock just to notice it.
This is a test of Andrews drunk texting, had this been an actual drunk text, all the words would be spelled incorrectly and would be missing key verbs and nouns, followed by a request to not get fired.
I'm just gonna pretend you didn't ask me that. I'll sweep that shattered moment of our friendship under the shame rug.
My house smells like bleach. Also, I do not feel bad about all the stuff I stole from the hospital while I was there.
Yea I almost drowned giving a BJ in the shower once
I guess I'm just gonna have to learn to live with the fact that I'm the guy who takes his pants off at the party and tries to start an orgy
I have just found the cubicle of sustenance. And I will rejoice at all the families that have not found this magic. This vodka cubicle of magic.
We found out if you get Ben high but stay sober yourself he is an AWESOME cook. You need to get your ass down here, this goes against everything I know to be real.
As she came, she moaned Roll Tide. I kid you not.
Despite evidence suggesting otherwise, it turns out max is 100%straight.
Nothing like an afternoon walk of shame across campus on parent's weekend. Damn.
100000% expect a picture of my ass in them
Randomize
