awww and there was just a proposal on stage with the pussycat dolls !!!!!
Did someone propose they get off the stage?
its time to go be "that drunk guy nobody knows"....again.
She's currently celebrating her completion of "Sober October" with "Margarita Shit-Show November."
He ate me out while I was wearing a tiara.... I think I could get used to this
You know those creepy dolls that look like they are watching you from anywhere in the room? It was like that, but with his penis...
I respect the size of her balls.
Yeah but I don't respect the size of her anything else.
Listen man, there's two things I know about in life: porn and sound. On a day that I'm wearing khakis, I need you to trust that I know what the fuck I'm doing.
I feel like cursing someone's first born child right now. Like I wanna maleficent some bitch.
In 2014 only three boys have seen my boobs so far
There. Isnt. A. Single. Person. Who. Is. Not. High. At. Church.
Don't tell him that you hope he dies in a boring missionary position with his wife. That doesn't go over well.
He made me watch a sex tape him and his gf made. They were in the shower when her roommate walked in on them. Not kidding: she asked to join in.
I hate him. He gets laid, my dick gets laughed at.
either he just commented on my nose ring or he's offering me cocaine, I honestly can't tell
Not all of us can be into hot dads. Some of us have to have commitment issues and be into musicians.
My life is just a trash fire of work and Japanese video games now
Randomize
