He introduced her to the DMA meeting by saying: in the past few years i've never seen someone work so hard for so little success
Her body is shaped like a coke bottle...a two liter coke bottle
eating mexican with the mother in law. this meal made her decide to tell us about her colon cleansing diet
I have never pre-planed for a better sober morning than lacing my muffin batch with tylenol.
just graduated on the spot on the quad where I vommed freshman year. full circle
At what point are you a chubby chaser or just desperate for sex?
Just rented the SCUBA equipment. Meet me at the pool to test the underwater beer bong idea.
I think the main reason you were throwing up so much was the quart of soap you chugged trying to burp bubbles. you came close
You said you were going inside to sober up and then you poured yourself a wine glass of warm gin
Be proud. You give fat lesbians everywhere shower-nozzle worthy material for weeks on end.
She could makes a perfectt roast dinner drunk but she nearly sets the kitchen alight microwaving popcorn.
Guys always stop talking to me right around the point that if they bought me food a couple times I would probably have sex with them.
All I got was pictures of my boss and dicks. So, that was the end of snapchat.
PS- My flight is being emergency landed bc someone smuggled cats on the plane.
Hey I didn't mean to come across like I was judging you about your liberal sexual choices. I would like details of your threesome if you need to talk about it!
Randomize
