i can't put facebook on my resume under hobbies.
Is it bad that everytime I read or hear "Woo Hoo" I immediately think of sex because of The Sims?
you wrote "5 million dollars" in the tip line for the pizza delivery man and insisted that he deserves it
My own mom unfriended me on Facebook.
4 am. She strained the mac and cheese onto her legs. She has no skin.
Its 6 am and me and the girl in the next apartment have been taking turns puking and yelling "never agaaaain" thru the walls.
I miss eating meals at a table and having unprotected sex..
We all make mistakes. Just lock them up deep down inside your mind so they can surface as weird sexual fantasies it takes your therapist years to decipher when your 40
Blacked out last night, but left myself a note that said "oops on oops on oops" that can never be a positive
You came on the chandelier from the first floor.. Of course were allowed back
He said he discovered the mysteries of the universe inside an orange... I want whatever he was on.
I need an office. I have big plans. I'm learning spanish this month.
Why did the sexual harassment class show a clip from frozen?
Hey! you should come over!
Who is this? The number is saved as "Sexy Awesome"
I woke up completely naked in a mint condition 71 chevelle in someones garage. What.
Randomize