508, what difference does it make? You were alone, anyway.
A girl just told me I should smile because I was surrounded by hot girls. I told her that clearly beauty was in the eye of the beholder. And she slapped me!
He is such a gentleman, he paid for my plan b
Spotted: jayne dropping her cigarettes in a puddle...then picking them back up and putting them in her pocket. If i ever get that desperate, stop talking to me
It's just like soggy cereal, but cancerous
do you ever think like no deep thought could take place in the spanish language? like all they talk about is like tacos?
how high are you?
he busted in while i was showering looked at me and said "youve lost weight bro, no homo" and started puking into the sink
Jason and steven are boiling shrimp in the microwave again
Dont act like I'm the only one that gets on a plane and picks out the one im gonna have fuck if we have time before the crash
You kept saying you we're gonna puke and wanted to steal my pants
That does not explain the remnants of a small fire in my bathtub.
This is the most boring acid ever. I feel like a child. But thats okay, I've been a child before, its nothing new.
By talk him into it I assume you mean blow him into it.
jesus, I think that canada gold metal game has completely changed all rules of acceptable drinking habits, I was fucked untill noon and I just got invited to go party when I get off work...at 600am...and NO ONE understood why i was hesitant
If I don't quit picking up guys when I'm drunk, I'm going to need a vagina transplant.
I will 100% jerk off using my own tears as lube before I'd ever bang a 4.
Someone had to wrestle her in the chocolate pool, I'm glad I was man enough to step up and do it
Randomize