dude, she has braces
i meant the dude w the ponytail.
i was less creeped out when i thought you were talking about the 14 y.o.
i'd fuck the guy who invented dead baby jokes.
Swear. I think after passing out in a community college parking lot I can safely nominate myself for the piece of shit of the year award
of all places to pass out....why right in front of our RA's door? OF ALL PLACES.
I just fucked my ex's ex's ex. Love quadrilateral complete
When did you hit me on the head with a stool?
It's no shave November. This is our time.
I'm hoping the sedatives kick in before I drunkenly decide to eat this whole cheesecake.
WE'RE MOVING TO IRELAND!!!! DON'T ASK QUESTIONS JUST BOOK THE DAMN FLIGHT!!!!
Okay so the couple who keep propositioning people for threeways are def siblings not bf/gf
So are you gonna do it or no you said they're hot
There's nothing like when u really click with a stripper
I also tried to hide a bottle of vodka in a build a bear last night so that something that happened in my life
I hate who I am becoming
I think of it as growth but I also hate who I am becoming as well
the cop asked if i was drunk and i responded with "breathalize me, cap'n". incidentally, he was a captain and i blew a .13.
Soooo you're telling me you support us groom's men giving lap dances to willing patrons?
Randomize