That was definitely a porn plot just waiting to develop...
Everytime she would start slurring, she'd stop, hold up a finger, wait like 30 seconds, then try again. I love drunk people
i threw up in his kitchen sink and then used a measuring cup to drink water because i couldn't find a clean glass. i just threw up down the stairs. it's gonna be a long walk home.
Swine flu is the new snow day.
drunk...on the white house tour...security is staring. this will not end well.
I also would have accepted most things ending in "job", erotic favors, and food.
I'm standing in line at the liquor store and they're making popcorn.
we are blowing up condoms and making balloons and we’re drunk on the floor. You could have come to school here
Hey could you buy me 2 bottles of arbor mist? I'm trying to get laid tonight
I think I have to break up with him. I just cried, not moaned, screamed, etc, cried, with tears of sadness and disappointment when I came.
Update: day 5 and Scott has not left the apartment. Still smoking. Pizza roll supply dwindling.
I haven't showered. And am sitting in the office smelling like a beer can someone's been using as an ash tray.
We had sex to Hey Arnold, Rugrats, and All That. I feel like my life has come full circle.
The Game of Thrones convention was just a drunk fuckfest.
Please tell me you banged Jon Snow.
I'm sorry my shit is everywhere... I accidentally got drunk while packing
Randomize
